Boredom

The last two years have not been boring.  I understand that transitional periods are sometimes seperated by periods of neutral uneventful stasis, but I can’t remeber the last time that I have experienced existential boredom on such a profound scale.

I have visa problems – the status quo for freelance international performers and creators.  I am therefore stuck in a professional purgatory between Tokyo and Taipei until August 22 – exactly two weeks after I was supposed to arrive.

So I’m having a bit of a forced vacation really.  Training is going well, at least.  I am reading some interesting books:

I am living with a Spanish flamenca and that provides a lot of opportunities to talk about culture, language, and art.  I am taking advantage of the scheduling mismatch by seeing a lot of friends with whom I have not been able to visit and by catching up on some lost sleep, but I find I react badly to boredom in general.

Why is it that when I have all the time to do the things I want to do my motivation flags?  Over the last year or so I was lucky when I had an hour or two of the day to myself.  I feel like I would accomplish more in those two hours than I do now in a whole week. I mentally detune without the pressure of deadlines and meetings.

I have not been writing every day.  I have not been working on my Chinese.  I have not been writing up all of the work I have done in Tokyo.  I haven’t even managed to get a haircut or sell my bike!

I think that the solution to the problem is going to involve some artificial deadlines.  Being disciplined when there are serious professional consequences is one thing; being disciplined when you have 24 hours of free time is quite another.

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