I think I am OK with the relationship with The Contortionist being over, but looking at a life of dating in Asia as a half-Asian is not obvious. I know that some Western men go crazy for Asian girls, but my first experiences in the Japan dating scene have been a little… artificial for my tastes, so far.
Now that I’m alone again I’m remembering that I love the way that men and women act together. It’s not like business or everyday life or family affairs. there is something timeless and immutable about what goes on between men and women. The energy, the excitement.
The Contortionist always told me that I’m distant in relationships. And I am. I guess I see relationships as a process, like any other, like building a motorcycle, flying a kite, or a rose blooming, and that getting too involved in that process will fuck it up.
In any case, I had my first official date since the breakup last week. I took a moment to enjoy dinner, movie, and drinks with The Publicist, a woman I met with two of my good friends in Tokyo (The Journalist and The Writer) works for one of the most well-know PR firms in Tokyo, is a self-described “unscrupulous daughter of an upper-middle-class Marxist.” The first date went well and she even expressed interest in doing publicity for our project if the time is ever right.
Our second date last night seemed fine as well, but a simple misunderstood text afterwards turned the whole situation into an ugly Japan dating mishap. She had been teasing me a little about how she was sure that I was gay because of my pronunciation of certain Japanese words. I guess I’ve learned the feminine pronunciation of some words from my female friends (MIzu instead of mizu, for example). So just after the date I sent her a text after the date thanking her for a good time and for letting me “pretend to be a heterosexual with her.” Evidently, she did not make the connection to her earlier teasing, thought that I was actually gay, and assumed that I had been playing with her emotions. Bilingual sarcasm never really works when speaking with non-native speakers.